November passed without updates, due to a myriad of reasons. I have a lot to write about and unpack from over the last few weeks.
I did do a sneaky little ‘secret’ November challenge, instead of my billed ‘going underground’. I never made a big song and dance about that one, as I always knew my real November challenge would be sitting my driving test! I had to schedule for November 19th, as this was the day my theory expired.
Obviously, I failed š otherwise I’d have been a lot quicker and more excited to update everyone š This is fail number 3 for me, which I say with no shame as even taking the test is huge for me- especially after fail number 2, that one was pretty spectacular due to the examiner making me feel hideously uncomfortable. The resulting additional angst meant my ability to follow even the most basic instruction went completely AWOL.
The thing is, I can drive perfectly well when not in test. The minute I’m confronted with the possibility of passing my test and being out on the road alone, I go into complete self-sabotage mode. I can see it happening- I knew I was failing my test that day before I even got in the car! My brain just starts to panic- like, “I can’t pass this, I’m not a safe driver!” And boom, there we are. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I am continuing on and re-doing my theory though. I love my instructor, she is fabulous, so I’m confident I’ll get there eventually once I let my brain catch up with my ability! š I’ll ultimately likely be one of the safest drivers on the road, I’ll have had so much tuition by the end of it all!š
The "Year of No Fear" 